Aims . To describe the positions adopted by close family members of a community sample of untreated heavy drinkers. Design . Detailed interview and questionnaire study of a sample of close family members and the heavy drinkers to whom they were related. Sample . 50 close relatives of 50 heavy drinkers drawn from a community cohort of 500 in the English West Midlands. Data . Perceived benefits and drawbacks of drinking checklist (family members and heavy drinkers); readiness to change questionnaire (family members and heavy drinkers); coping questionnaire (family members only); semi-structured interview (family members only). Findings . A wide range of positions towards their relatives' heavy drinking was evident in this sample of family members. Most recognised at least some drawbacks to their relatives' drinking, and some were engaged in efforts to change it. A number of impediments to taking a stand about their relatives' drinking were apparent, including recognising the benefits of drinking, mitigating factors, the wish not to be intolerant, others' support for their relatives' drinking, and sometimes the family member's own heavy drinking. Conclusions . Some light has been thrown on the experiences of a hitherto neglected population of family members, who may face a number of difficulties and dilemmas in deciding how to respond in the face of heavy drinking.